Upon settling in for the long flight from Atlanta to Johannesburg we heard the Rocky theme come over the intercom followed by multiple passengers doing their conditioning and warmups for the marathon we were beginning. Good stretching and self-affirmations messages (such as: "you can DO this...come on we've been training for this") were seen and heard throughout the cabin.
What exactly does a person do on a 16-hour flight? There are really so many things to do it is really like an amusement park. The obvious answer to entertainment is that one SLEEPS on a flight this long. Let me rephrase…one TRIES to sleep. Now remember that we are in economy so it looks a little different on the back of the plane than the front. It is slightly less comfortable than the king sized bed up front and there is a distinct lack of teddy bears that were handed out (though if more were handed out they would be used as a pillow and not a cuddling device). Let me put it this way- turning backward in the seat so that your rear is pushing up against the seat in front of you while simultaneously shoving your head into the back of your own seat and supporting yourself with a pillow whose thickness is akin to a pair of socks…that my friends is such a comfortable relief that you almost feel like you got upgraded to first class. It is a bonus is you are also getting a back massage from the person in front of you pushing their seat repeatedly against your backside and a full body massage if the person behind you is doing the same to the back of your seat.
While on one of my morning jogs I decided to take along a notebook and pen and as I walked down the aisles I studied the other passengers and took some notes for ideas on how I could better simulate first class. Kind of like going to the restaurant bathroom the long way so that you can walk by everyone else’s plate to help you decide what to order. If you have a buddy whose jogging with you together you can also provide helpful score cards to the other passengers based on two main areas- comfort and creativity. Scorecards are left on the passengers to find when they awake.
Different nationalities and sexes all prove to provide a wealth of ideas, yet there are some common themes you will find. One of the most popular themes I refer to as “detachment”. What this involves is allowing your head to droop to one side until it hits the next object below it, causing such a severe angle that creates the illusion of a detached head from the body. It’s a favorite among chiropractic circles. Another slight less popular theme is the “DOA”. To pull this one off you use your travel blanket to completely cover your body head to toe; then bring your hands in to your sides and stare straight ahead. Another version of this is one of my personal favorites and used most frequently. This style sends the message “they haven’t found me yet”. Rather than covering yourself with the blanket you instead bring down your seat tray and slump over it, smashing your face into the tray (though this is risky if you've just had airplane food- they are likely to give you medical attention). All in all I feel pretty proud of myself because I frequently hear “good one” from other morning joggers as they come by my seat.
Twice now I have gone to the only uninhabited area in the plane to stretch and have leaned up against something that felt very cold. Upon further investigation I found the source of the chill was a long handle with a placard next to it that reads, “to open emergency exit push this handle”. I’m grateful that I didn’t step outside for some fresh air.
0 comments:
Post a Comment